NEWS RELEASE
128 Danforth Ave, Box 242
Toronto, ON
M4K 1N1
Canada



FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
June 24, 1999



Phronq Hermes Penumbra-Snelgrove Swears Off Hernando's Texas Red Chili

Phronq Hermes Penumbra-Snelgrove, member of the rock band The G. Gordon Liddys has sworn off Hernando's Texas Red Chili this morning, following the devastating after-effects caused by it's consumption.

"It had unusually high cayenne levels, which made the chili quite enjoyable at the time of consumption. Unfortunately, the cayenne was absorbed into my body during the digestive processes, causing all of my precious bodily fluids to go spicy." reported Mr. Penumbra-Snelgrove. "The next morning my eyes burned very slightly, my nose had burning hot mucous in it, my urine could have been used to start a fire, and well, my ass is still in flames after a good hard purging. In hindsight, no pun intended, I probably shouldn't have eaten the peppers themselves."

Penumbra-Snelgrove then added; "When they work their way through, well… I didn't realize that the nerve endings in certain spots were that well developed."

Dr. Sans Papier, doctor of splenography at the Clinic for People Who Need Clinics reports that there is a direct correlation between eating Texas Red Chili and spontaneous human combustion.

"There is a direct correlation between eating Texas Red Chili and spontaneous human combustion." reported Dr. Papier.

How will this affect Mr. Penumbra-Snelgrove's eating habits?

"I intend to keep eating Hernando's food, particularly the Enchiladas Del Norte, but I may try it with con carne next time. Until sphincter replacement surgery reaches acceptable levels, I will avoid the Texas Red."

Hernando could not be reached for comment.

-30-





About the G. Gordon Liddys

Canadian punk/ska/polka/metal legends The G. Gordon Liddys have recently released a concept album entitled "Space Brains from Outer Space".It is a gripping, timely story of lust, greed, betrayal, and hyena penises.The self-described 'obnoxious, money-grubbing bastards' wrote this press release in order to try and sell more CDs so they can become wealthy industrialists who rule the universe with an iron fist. And maybe score some free beer.


Contact:
The Evil Galactor
128 Danforth Ave, Box 242
Toronto, ON
M4K 1N1
Canada

galactor@moodyloner.com
http://www.moodyloner.com/liddys

416-465-3390

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